♥^^Peony Princess ^^♥

I am have spent all month crying..... I feel trapped and stuck here and the one person I could talk to and made me feel a bit better doesn't love me anymore..... Last night I took a sleeping pill but as soon as I wake up I feel so sick and sad I want to take another again but I can't. I really feel so lonely and lost right now. I wish I could spend the whole day sleeping but life doesn't this way.... my anxiety has been pretty bad this month. I use to get  joy from shopping and not anymore. I don't get joy from anything I realized  this today. I have gained more weight  but there are some days I don't feel like eating anything at all and some days I want to eat everything. I feel completely lost and my dreams seem so impossible now. The person I had fallen in love changed over night . even though i never met him ( I know is retarded of me) we spent hours and hours chatting and on webcam. I felt comfortable talking to him but now I suddenly became no one to him. all I do is take care of my mom all day ,cook and clean and this has become so horrible for me. everyday it is worst . I want something different.